P

Good things come to those who wait is a phrase generally told by busy people to others whom they are about to inconvenience. It is usually best ignored as an irritating platitude.

However, I find that today my patience has rewarded me. After weeks of waiting, keeping my nose clean, and being generally innocuous, eventually the piece of evidence for which I had been sniffing fell right into my lap.

My theory was this: Q must have been killed to either discover or silence the secret that she knew. Therefore, should I discover the secret and who knew it, I would be led to the perpetrator of the crime. So, my first weeks at the Agency consisted of slipping Q's picture to fellow agents and raising my eyebrows suggestively. This yielded very little results until this morning.

On the communal bulletin board at headquarters, amidst flyers advertising cats named "Lost" and secret chess meetings, I had placed a photo of Q. Hidden in a potted plant that I'd dragged over in order for the board to be in my line of sight, I watched and waited.

An agent walked over and scanned the board, lingering on the photo.

This was my cue to get up and interrogate:

"Did you know her?" I asked, upon stumbling out of the plant and over to the agent.

"Yes," replied the agent, turning back to the photo, "Quite well,"

"Quite good," I corrected, "Yes, she was,"

"And your name is?" the agent asked,

"Irrelevant. Yours?" I countered.

A smile: "P,"

We discussed Q a while longer, in vague terms, but throughout it all, a sense of acute unease crept upon me like a tiger or fairly rabid mongoose. How was someone from the Agency well acquainted (and on friendly terms with) a trusted member of the Organisation?

P did not mention ever having been a spy in the Organization (nor did I recall the agent from my extensive time there), but had discussed working with Q at length, and accurately.

I am unsettled in the extreme. I will not believe that Q was a spy. It simply does not fit into my reality. P must be lying, or hiding something, or selectively non-truthing.

Despite the turmoil it has caused me, this lead with P is still valuable. Perhaps this agent will know more details surrounding Q's murder, which will be divulged once we establish a further connection. We made dinner plans.

Now, if you would excuse me, I have to go quietly scream into a pillow while I contemplate reality-shattering concepts of betrayal, loss, and futility.

- A.M. Ham